sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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