It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize