in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
