sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
