Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
