they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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