Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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