I wanna bring you to show and tell
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
