bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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