is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
They have beer where we have blood.
Randomize
