batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
