I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
