i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
My vagina just recognized that song.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
