Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
