Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize