I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I think I won the penis lottery.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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