If you die in college, do you die in real life?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize