Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i just google imaged poop.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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