he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
