She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
