Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
My sheets look like a crime scene.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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