i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
