ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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