the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize