is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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