none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I have feelings that need drinking.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
