Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
vagina is talking i cant
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
