Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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