That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Randomize
