So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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