how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize
