Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My vagina just clenched in fear
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You left your phone here
Wait...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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