alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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