Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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