I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Michael Bay diarrhea
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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