I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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