Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
