Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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