Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
