THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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