dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
