yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
