Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
