are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
