Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Randomize
