booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
