I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
