i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I deserve this hangover.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
