her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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