Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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